Every mentoring relationship I know of started with an apprentice asking a leader to mentor him/her. Which is completely awkward and, I'm not sure, but maybe unbiblical.
Paul talked about the relationship between spiritual mentors and apprentices in 2 Corinthians 12:14 - "For the children ought not to lay up for the parents, but the parents for the children."
I read this as - "Spiritual parents, remove the barriers for your apprentices."
To proactively mentor someone is not arrogant. It's an act of service. Rather than "fielding questions" over a lunch you make them pay for... seek out apprentices and find out how you can serve them.
I completely agree with your assertion that we are doing mentoring backwards. We should be calling people to follow Jesus the same way Jesus called people to follow Him (notice I didn't say we should be calling people to follow US!). Jesus called Zacheus from the Sycamore tree, Levi from the tax booth, etc. I talk more about discipling on my blog than "mentoring" but I think sometimes we use those terms interchangeably. I also think it is important not to just find the cool people to mentor or disciple...sometimes we need to find someone who has a teachable spirit but may not be as trendy or influential.
Posted by: Nathan Creitz | November 10, 2008 at 01:28 PM
nice
Posted by: Mack | November 10, 2008 at 01:46 PM
Good stuff to chew on!
Posted by: Ted Egly | November 10, 2008 at 01:51 PM
Some of my best mentoring moments have been with my staff after I initiated 30 min formal mentoring apptmts with them - one of my best leadership decisions ever!
Posted by: John Finkelde | November 11, 2008 at 03:14 AM
I agree that people should be looking for others to mentor, but I think it's also okay for you to ask someone to be your mentor. In fact, I did that a few weeks ago. The guy was excited about it because he shared with me how three mentors had played a huge role in his life and ministry and that he had wanted to invest in someone else the way they had invested in him. He didn't know I wanted a mentor until I asked him though. In "Working the Angles" by Eugene Peterson he states that we need to be and have a spiritual director. That it happens on both ends.
Posted by: Jeremy Keegan | November 11, 2008 at 05:58 AM
Jeremy, I think my post was written more from the angle of "who are YOU going to mentor?"
Is there someone to whom you qualify as a spiritual parent?
Posted by: Ben Arment | November 11, 2008 at 08:26 AM
Ben,
I find this post very freeing - sometimes I'm not sure if I'm being too proactive in my attempts to invest in others - maybe I'm being too pushy; maybe they'd ask if they wanted my input; maybe I can't really add anything to them.
Thanks for the encouragement.
Posted by: Travis Thompson | November 11, 2008 at 09:43 AM
Well said.
A good mentor / coach see’s something in you that you don’t see and helps you bring it out.
That doesn’t happen if the conversation is one sided.
Posted by: daniel d | November 11, 2008 at 11:40 AM
Hmmmm....Friday. Very interesting
Posted by: Leonce Crump II | November 17, 2008 at 11:15 PM
I have shut down trying to find a mentor. Mostly because when I attempt to ask to be an apprentice I get this glazed look from the prospective mentor as if they really don't want mentor or maybe it is me just being too sensitive. My mentor died before I became a Christian and now I much appreciate his advice. So pray that I find another or others that I can have face to face mentor ship
Posted by: Lamar Hinson | November 20, 2008 at 10:06 PM